(RL) Minor Keys - wtf?

[KWood@lightbridge.com]

I've got a music theory question regarding minor keys.

Why do we have minor (as in 'relative-minor/aeolian') keys when the
chords/scales/modes in the key are exactly the same as those in the
relative Major key but in a different order?  It screws with my thinking a
bit when I cannot rely on the 'I' chord always being a major seventh, the
'II' chord being a dominant 7th minor, etc.

Why not say the song is in the (relative) major key but uses the minor
chords of that key?

Is it harmony, perhaps, and the ways (which I do not completely understand)
that one chord 'leads' to another that is maintained by this approach?  A
way of saying perhaps that 'The V chord ALWAYS resolves nicely to the I
chord', even if you're in a minor key...?  Wheras if we were using my idea
of saying that a given song is in the key of C major when it's really
centered around A minor (6th mode or relative minor of C major), then the
idea that V resolves to 1 wouldn't really help because the tonal center of
the song would be a minor chord/sound.

If that's anywhere near the mark, then would this idea apply to any mode of
the scale?  If I have a song based around the 3rd (Phrygian) mode of the
major scale, would I then want to treat that as the I chord and adjust the
others accordingly?  I have a strong feeling the answer is 'no', but...

...ideas?

thx,
-kent

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